Demi Lovato: Simply Complicated – Official documentary

I loved Demi Lovato’s documentary on YouTube titled “simply complicated”. It’s such an honest and vulnerable interview. She candidly speaks on her personal demons and the incredible resiliency she found within herself to overcome them.

I really respected her vulnerability and I personally related to many of the struggles she’s experienced as a young woman still trying to find her way.

For me, the most powerful and touching part of the documentary was when she opened up about the pain she felt over the tremendous loss of her one true love, Wilmer Valderama.

I have to admit, I teared up watching her her recount the moment she met Wilmer and how his love and support helped her through the darkest times of her life. She explains the painful reality of codependent love and the disappointing realization that sometimes even the most electrifying soul connections aren’t always intended to last. It still doesn’t stop her from confessing to the world her undying love for the man she says saved her in so many ways.

It’s also enduring to listen to her explain her conflicted emotions over maintaining a positive outlook on life today in spite of the pain she feels over the loss of that relationship and her ongoing struggle to maintain a life of sobriety.

Lessons learned. Bridges burned.

Demi is such a huge talent with an even bigger heart. I’ve always loved her as an artist but I’ve gained an even deeper respect for her as a human being. She’s so inspiring and I hope to catch her on tour this upcoming year.

Here’s an excerpt from the documentary along with the video of the entire interview below.

“I’ve never loved anybody like I loved Wilmer and like I still love Wilmer.”

“When I met him and laid eyes on him for the first time I was in hair and make up. He came and sat down and I was like, I love this man and I have to have him, but I was only seventeen.”

“I think it was love at first sight. And I don’t really believe in that, but I believe that it happened.”

“I do have moments where it’s late at night and I’m lonely and I wonder if I made the right decision because love is a gamble. I don’t know if I’ll lose him for the rest of my life.

“I think my heart’s always with Wilmer, I think it was with Wilmer, and think that it is with Wilmer and I think that it will be with Wilmer. Because you don’t share six years with a person and not give them a piece of your heart and vice versa. Like, I’m pretty sure I’m not gonna find someone that compares to him, but I’m trying to keep an open heart and an open mind when it comes to that.

“The spark’s never faded but I have issues that I haven’t conquered yet that I know I won’t conquer if I’m relying on somebody else to take care of the loneliness.”

“One way” by 6lack and T-Pain has me feeling some type of way.

We still haven’t even been to each other’s house

But baby that could wait for another time

I never been one to fuck up the vibe

Though I might fuck up your life

My favorite dancer/choreographer by far is Aliyah Janell, the woman in thigh high black boots and orange hat. She’s got a pretty big following on Instagram and YouTube if you want to check her out. There’s no doubt that her talent and passion really bring this sexy choreography to life.

“O, swear not by the moon, th’ inconstant moon..”

The man in the moon must really be missing me tonight because he’s glowing, bigger and brighter than normal; no longer hiding behind the fog of clouds or acting seemingly distant like the countless nights before. It’s almost like he’s trying to catch my attention, pull me back in and make me believe that he might be close enough to touch.

Forever my December.

As the music softly plays in the background, I grab my glass of Cabernet and watch the puff of smoke fill the air as it escapes my lungs. I’ll willingly give into him yet again, knowing he is the one who has loved me the purest because he has loved me the longest. And how could I ever deny something so magnetic, so captivating and so perfectly imperfect?..

You and I both know the others were just shooting stars, but you, you will always be my beloved but inconstant moon.

Taylor Swift & her Reputation: Look what you made her do

She’s a complicated, passionate, honest, smart, angry, and vengeful kind of mess, but her fans adore her for it. Long gone are the days of sweet country love songs about boys who left her heartbroken with teardrops on her guitar. The “new Taylor” is like an erupted volcano; spilling over with emotions of hurt, anger and the purging of lackluster ex lovers who have undoubtedly crossed her. Her insistence on telling her unapologetic truth through music along with her over the top artistic expressions doesn’t seems to be letting up anytime soon either. Like it or not, Taylor Swift has taken every stone thrown at her and used it to build her own unique pathway within the music industry. And who wouldn’t love to get even with an ex, while capitalizing on the pain and getting paid out millions? Seems to me that Taylor has learned the art of illusion, seduction and manipulation and has used it to her full advantage in the media and with men alike. Love her or hate her, she’s still making headlines as one of the highest paid and most controversial female performers of this generation.

“I did something bad” is a combination of airing dirty laundry, cold revenge and gloating in the ever present, unfiltered truth. Miss Swift owns her new identity as the heartbreaker and kills her previous reputation as the heartbroken good girl. No longer the victim, she seems to have taken on the personalities of all the calloused men that have betrayed her and forced her to become the heroin of her own love story.

The single even boasts the sound of gunshots being fired during the chorus, as if to say, “you’ve taken your shots, now I’m here taking mine.” The bold lyrics are straight to the point and in this stripped down cover you’re able to keep the focus on each jaded word. It has received plenty of praise from the public as well as Taylor Swift herself. Tony winner Cynthia Erivo and Wicked actress Shoshana Bean give new life to the most talked about song featured on the singer’s Reputation album, released last Friday.

I never trust a narcissist

But they love me

So I play ’em like a violin

And I make it look oh so easy

‘Cause for every lie I tell them

They tell me three

This is how the world works

Now all he thinks about is me

I can feel the flames on my skin

Crimson red paint on my lips

If a man talks shit, then I owe him nothing

I don’t regret it one bit, ’cause he had it coming

They say I did something bad

Then why’s it feel so good?

They say I did something bad

But why’s it feel so good?

Most fun I ever had

And I’d do it over and over and over again if I could

It just felt so good, good

I never trust a playboy

But they love me

So I fly with him all around the world

And I let them think they saved me

They never see it comin’

What I do next

This is how the world works

You gotta leave before you get left

I can feel the flames on my skin

He says, “Don’t throw away a good thing”

But if he drops my name, then I owe him nothin’

And if he spends my change, then he had it comin’

They’re burning all the witches, even if you aren’t one

They got their pitchforks and proof

Their receipts and reasons

They’re burning all the witches, even if you aren’t one

So light me up (light me up), light me up (light me up)

Light me up, go ahead and light me up (light me up)

Light me up (light me up), light me up (light me up)

Light me up (light me up), light me up (light me up)

I’ve always been in love with the Goblin King. 👑

Sarah, beware. I have been generous up ’til now. I can be cruel.

Generous? What have you done that’s generous?

*Everything*! Everything that you wanted I have done. You asked that the child be taken. I took him. You cowered before me, I was frightening. I have reordered time. I have turned the world upside down, and I have done it all for *you*! I am exhausted from living up to your expectations. Isn’t that generous?

Did I drive you away?

Coldplay has consistently been my go to music for long commutes, road trips and late night cruises. I’ve cried oceans of tears to this track alone over the years because it echoes my own heartfelt sentiments. Whenever I want to evoke deep emotions over the present, future or past, I play “sparks” and allow myself to come undone.

I find myself making excuses to get away on late nights like these to take that long drive down Pecos road and let the tears fall. Alone, I make my way thru the dark searching for clarity and resolutions. I guess I mostly prefer this dark route because of the barely there street lights. The darkness makes it easy to hide all my sadness. Millions of bright stars light up the night sky the further I continue to venture out. Sometimes I find myself lost in daydreams of the past or get caught up in fantasizes of the future. Either way, I’m always tempted to run away to places where no one knows me at all.

The mystery of the unexplored road always has me wondering if there is something or someone still out there searching for me or waiting to be found. The wanderlust within me grows the further and further away i get from the city, closer to the base of the mountains. The need to escape seems overwhelmingly strong on nights like tonight. Like many of the male disappointments in my life, the disarming road comes abruptly to a dead end, leaving me abandoned in utter darkness and despair.

The knowledge of this should probably stop me from continuing to take this gloomy drive, but I’ve come to see that it’s probably the best metaphor for how I view love and relationships in life. Understanding that all circumstances are temporary and that we are all dispensable, gives me the courage to fall in love wholeheartedly with every single soul and moment God sends my way.

The last time I took my drive down Pecos I saw the beginnings of construction taking place to expand the freeway. The realization of losing this space made me feel a profound ache in my heart, but I understand change and growth are just another part of being alive. One day I know my special place will become filled with the hustle and bustle of city life and the road that hid my tears with darkness will be lit up by endless freeway lights. I know the way this road used to make me feel will soon be a memory of the past. I know I’ll take this drive when all is said and done and reminisce on the nights I found sanctuary driving down these barren streets. I’ll play this song and feel the bittersweet sting of closure, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt..

I saw sparks.

I was his Marilyn Monroe..

“I’ve never fooled anyone. I’ve let men fool themselves. They didn’t bother to find out who and what I was. Instead they would invent a character for me. I wouldn’t argue with them. They were obviously loving somebody I wasn’t.”

Maroon 5 drops their new album and it’s amazing!

I am absolutely obsessed with Maroon 5’s new album “red pill blues”. I️ definitely can relate to all the material and the whole new vibe. Besides the singles that are already being overplayed on the radio, these are some of the other tracks I️ really took to…

“Best 4 u” is an honest confession from a toxic partner warning his lover of the inevitable pain she’ll experience if he doesn’t cut ties with her now. The catchy chorus doesn’t downplay the fact that the lyrics are definitely a dark foreshadowing. Sometimes trying to deter someone from pursuing you can actually backfire and make them want you more. Eventually they come to learn the hard way that ignorance isn’t always bliss.

“Closure” is currently my favorite. I️ love the lyrics raw honesty about break ups and cutting ties..especially the physical ones. True sexual chemistry is really hard to find and once you find it, it can be incredibly difficult to let go of. I️ know I’m not the only one who’s had “closure” go on for weeks, months or even years with a passionate ex lover. No matter how much time has passed or how many bridges have been burned, some connections with certain people can never be denied. The sexy track is over eleven minutes long (due to an extended outro that has a late night jam session feel to it.) For that reason it makes it the perfect song to leave on repeat while you go in for more “closure”.

“If you want closure, come on and close that door

I know, know, know what’cha really came for”

“Whiskey” had me in my feelings from the very first note. I like the reflective lyrics about the innocence of young or new love. Definitely made me feel some nostalgia for moments of the past. But with lyrics like these…how could it not?

I really like this duet between Adam Levine and Julia Michaels. Her husky voice perfectly compliments Adam’s impressive falsetto vocal range.

Not gonna lie, this is probably the track that you’ll end up dancing to in your underwear. It’s super sad lyrics but it’s upbeat tempo somehow makes it work.

Denim jacket goes along with the nostalgia you hear in “whiskey”. It’s tender yet still bittersweet.

All in all.. this is the first album in a really long time that I am able to let play beginning to end and truly enjoy.

Cheers to Maroon 5!